To The Mom Whose Heart is Heavy for Her Child, You Are Not Alone

by Nancy Reynolds

This post: To The Mom Whose Heart is Heavy for Her Child, You Are Not Alone

Written by: Carol Moore

To the mom whose heart is heavy for her child today…

The one whose thoughts are distracted by what she can’t seem to fix. The one who feels afraid or ashamed to share her worries with anyone – you are not alone. We are all that mom, at times, no matter the age of our kid. No matter how good things appear on the outside. We have one child who is weighing heavy on our heart today. You are not alone.

To The Mom Whose Heart is Heavy for Her Child, You Are Not Alone


At some time or another, one of our kids will rock our boat in a way that we could never have prepared for. Maybe your child (or one of your kids) has rocked your boat since birth, or maybe something has shifted with them along the way. But one thing is for sure – not one of us is immune to this turbulence.

I could speak at length about things that I have heard, observed, and experienced that have put moms into this place of solitary ache for their children. The themes are similar and they seep into every generation.

You might know the ache as you’re reading this – the ache in your heart for your own child. This helpless and heavy weight that we carry is much like the way a shepherd carries the burden of his lost sheep. He would do anything to bring them back safely into the flock, to see them thrive, and to know they will be okay. 

So, why are we tempted to just share the highlight reels about our kids? Why do guilt and shame taint our story when one of our kids is doing or experiencing something that worries us – when they are about to take or have already taken a wrong turn?

Do we think we will be judged for our kid’s struggles or imperfections by other moms or parents? When every single one of us will have a heavy heart for one of our kids at some point in time, why aren’t we coming together, sharing our experiences, learning from one another, and holding each other up with acceptance and grace?

If we have a child struggling with anxiety, depression, disengagement, or big emotions at home – when we feel helpless to ease their distress, we push it down and smile for our friends. When they can’t keep up with the demands of school or they don’t make the team, we avoid the subject with other moms. If our child is willful, has a disability, is causing self-harm, is addicted, or won’t speak to us, we hold back our tears, straighten our shoulders, and walk alone.

We quietly conceal the truth from each other that we are all experiencing in varying degrees – our heavy hearts.

But this mom assignment was never meant to be easy, nor to be taken alone. This struggle is real as we pour out our hearts for these young souls of the next generation. We sacrifice our bodies, careers, interests, hobbies, and many of our needs for our children who completely captivate our lives. It’s a weary walk with far more obstacles than tools.

What if we could concede to the notion that we are each other’s most effective and efficient tool? Moms walking alongside other moms creates a fortitude like no other. When moms can sit beside one another in their worry, fear, and in their hopelessness knowing they will not be judged, then this sometimes seemingly impossible assignment receives the promise of hope.

We are all passing through these seasons with our kids – figuring things out as we go along. As we pass through these seasons filled with moments of grace and moments of turmoil, let’s reach our hand back to the mom just entering into the teen years with her kids, the mom who needs advice, the mom who needs a shoulder to lean on, the mom who just needs to vent.

Let’s share our stories of the hope and the mess and how we got through them all to give another mom the courage and the endurance to keep going. 

To the Mom whose heart is heavy for her kid today – you are not alone. You are a member of the most populated club in the universe. This assignment isn’t easy, and it was never intended to be.

Our hearts will be heavy over and over again. We will laugh and love and cry and ache for our kids. They will wander and return. When their hearts break, ours will break bigger. When they get lost on their journey, we will never find peace until they are found.

There is simply no way around this heaviness we will feel for our kids, but there is a way to go through it, and I believe this is with each other. 

Our beautiful stories, social media posts, and highlight reels about our kids are great – let’s keep sharing all of this with each other. We need to see the things that are going well. We need to see the successes and the joys and the light that shines from our kids.

But let’s be careful not to keep the troublesome parts to ourselves. We all need to see and know that no matter how good things appear on the outside, there will still be deep struggles and rough patches that we all have to crawl through. No more shame. No more guilt, please. You are not alone.

About Carol Moore:

Carol is a certified Coach, Parenting Teens Advocate, and author of Bridges Not Barriers – The Art of Building a Better Connection with Your Teen. She is also a designated Global Presence Ambassador for Parenting 2.0, a non-profit organization recognized around the globe for the Life Skills educational process. With 15 years of experience working with young children and their families, and having raised two teens of her own, she has a passion for sharing her knowledge in raising teens with grace, compassion, honesty, and trust. Follow Carol on Instagram and check out her book here: BRIDGES Not BARRIERS: The Art of Building a Better Connection with Your Teen

If you enjoyed reading, “To The Mom Whose Heart is Heavy for Her Child Today, I See You,” you might also enjoy reading: 

To The Lonely Moms Raising Teenagers, I See You

12 Must-Watch TED Talks for Parents of Teenagers

Raising Teens Can Be Lonely: Here’s Why You Need Mom Friends You Can Relate To (Plus, Tips to Make Friends)

Why Not Join Us?
I agree to have my personal information transfered to MailChimp ( more information )
Join over 3.000 visitors who are receiving our newsletter and learn how to optimize your blog for search engines, find free traffic, and monetize your website.
RAISING TEENS TODAY is a resource and safe zone for parents to share the joys, challenges, triumphs and frustrations of raising our oh, so imperfect (but totally awesome) teens. PLUS, sign up and you'll receive my FREE e-Book "Scoring Scholarships!"

You may also like


Diane July 4, 2023 - 7:51 am

I’m speechless.. Thank you

Barbara Chambers July 4, 2023 - 8:56 am

Great great wonderful written

Dee July 4, 2023 - 10:58 am

My 18 year old daughter met a man, 26 years old just before going away to college. She met him at the gym, they have that in common they love the gym. I wasn’t to worried because i figured it would fizzle out with the distance although my husband and I expressed our concerns of his age and the fact that he has a seven year old daughter. He said he would come visit her one week out of each month but that turned into him moving down there and my daughter staying with him and not in her dorm. He controls her and she doesn’t see it as that, she sees it as love. When it was time to come home for the summer he moved back home and she stayed with him because she didn’t like our rules. Our rules were just to come home at night. He is keeping her from her family and friends but she is blind to it.

Nancy Reynolds July 5, 2023 - 5:23 am

That must be so incredibly hard on you and your husband. The difficult part is that your daughter is 18 and that means less control on your part. Your influence is your greatest source of power… the closer you are to her and the more involved in her life you are, the more influence you can have in her life. Even if he is trying to shelter your daughter from family and friends, keep calling, keep dropping by (if you can), keep texting her, keep asking her over or asking her to go places with you. Stay as connected as possible with plenty of love and guidance and support. She needs you in her life and hopefully, in time, she’ll come to see the situation for what it is. xo

Cindy July 7, 2023 - 9:45 pm

My daughter left home at 16. Nothing could prepare me for the heartbreak. A few years later we reconciled. It was wonderful. She went on to get a masters degree and have a beautiful family(we were very close). Last year my father passed. A year before he died he started telling my daughter I was stealing from him and other lies. My daughter and father are atheist. She worshiped him. So she believed all the lies he told her. Now I can’t see her or my 11 and 8 year old granddaughters. More heartbreak. I pray for my daughter and family always (not just once a day). I know God will use this for his good but I pray it will be soon.

Yvonne February 29, 2024 - 8:32 pm

I needed this, I have a son who’s 17, my only child. We were always so close , UNTIL life fell apart for us and now we are what I feel is so far apart. Maybe it’s the age , maybe it’s just that we are both carrying our hurts different and just can’t communicate. All I know is I feel so alone. I miss us, I miss the me I was before life changed . Grief, lose, medical issues , just a lot and I can’t find my way through .
I don’t trust many , I feel judged and misunderstood

Nancy Reynolds March 2, 2024 - 7:20 pm

I am so very sorry to hear that you’re going through such a difficult time. I can feel your pain in your words and my heart goes out to you. Have you tried therapy for both you and your son? We all need help navigating relationships, at times. Please know that no matter how far apart you may feel from your son at the moment, you CAN find your way back… it’s never too late. Don’t give up and don’t lose hope. xo


Leave a Comment