14 Tender & Supportive “Open When” Letters for Teenagers

by Nancy Reynolds

This Post: 14 Tender & Supportive “Open When” Letters for Teenagers

Parenting teenagers certainly isn’t for the faint of heart. But, I think most parents will agree that being a teenager isn’t a cakewalk either…

At a time in our kids’ lives when we have so much worldly wisdom to share, they’re (all too often) not interested in hearing any of it. They’re pulling away from us, striving for more independence, and, at times, fighting us every step of the way all while trying to get a handle on a mountain of swinging hormones, a changing body, and a roller coaster of emotions.

So, how can we keep the lines of communication open with our teens, share the wisdom we’re so eager to impart, and let them know we love them unconditionally?

What worked for me was “Open When” letters. 

I’ve written dozens of letters to my kids throughout their tween and teen years – it always amazed me how just a few tender words could soften a harsh blow, empower my kids, and remind them of my unwavering love.

Here are 14 tender, loving, and supportive “Open When” letters for teenagers.

NOTE: These are just suggestions, parents… You can choose ANY “open when” topic and write what’s in your heart.

14 Tender & Supportive “Open When” Letters for Teenagers

 

Main Letter EXAMPLE:

My Dear (Insert Your Teen’s Name Here),

Your teen years will be an incredible journey filled with ups and downs, exciting “firsts” and adventures, and plenty of challenging moments. As we navigate these years together, (because we might have our own ups and downs, too) I want you to have something special to hold onto. Something that can, hopefully, offer you comfort, guidance, and a reminder of my steadfast, unconditional love for you.

These “Open When” letters are meant to be a little lifeline for different moments you might experience in the next few years. Open them when you need a boost, loving guidance, or a reminder of how much I love you AND always will.

With all my love,
MOM 

 

1. Open When You Need a Boost in Confidence

Oh, if only you could see yourself through MY eyes! You are an amazing person with incredible talents and strengths. It’s normal to have moments of self-doubt, (everyone does), but don’t let those moments define you. Take a deep breath and think about how far you’ve come, everything you’ve achieved, the challenges you’ve overcome, and the unique qualities that make you who you are. You’re capable of so much more than you realize. Believe in yourself, just like I believe in you every single day!

2. Open When You’re Feeling Lonely

Loneliness can be so hard, but remember that you are loved and cherished by so many people, (mostly ME!). Try not to allow your loneliness to consume you… reach out and connect with your friends and family, even if it’s just a quick text or a phone call. Sometimes, a simple conversation can make all the difference. And remember, my door is always open, and my ears are always ready to listen. You will never be alone.

3. Open When You’re In Love

Cherish this beautiful experience! It’s a magical and exciting time in your life and I’m so thrilled you’ve found someone to love who loves you back. I know you’re probably feeling a whirlwind of emotions – excitement, joy, and maybe a little nervousness, too. Embrace these feelings and enjoy every moment. It’s all so normal and wonderful!

Remember to always be your authentic self and treat your boyfriend/girlfriend/partner with kindness and respect. Love is about sharing, growing, and learning together. And no matter what, I’m here for you to talk, laugh, or just listen.

4. Open When You’ve Messed Up Royally

First and foremost, I want you to take a deep breath. I know right now you’re probably feeling so many emotions – guilt, regret, frustration, maybe even fear. It’s okay. Making mistakes is a part of life. What truly matters is how you learn and grow from your mistakes.

We all mess up at times! Sometimes, those mistakes feel enormous and overwhelming. But I want you to remember that no mistake defines who you are. It’s what you do next that counts. You are not your mistakes, and one moment of poor judgment doesn’t negate all your amazing qualities and the potential you have.

5. Open When You Hate Me

The truth is, hon, I remember hating my parents a time or two when I was growing up. Looking back, they were good parents doing their best to raise me right and protect me. And, hopefully, in time, you’ll realize the same thing.

In my heart,  I know you don’t hate me, you’re just fighting for more independence and that’s okay. Just know I love you and I’m doing my best to give you the freedom you need to grow while doing my best to protect you and guide you along the way. I AM doing my best…

6. Open When Life is Hard

Sometimes, it feels as though your world is crashing in around you… I’ve been there and it’s just so hard. But living life means you’re in a constant state of flux. Nothing ever stays the same. These overwhelming, hard times will pass in time. Just buckle down for a bit, try your best to work through it, and keep your eye on the beautiful horizon in the distance.

Also, never ever make a long-term decision to fix a short-term problem, and know that you can always come home… for a homecooked meal, a big hug, or a listening ear. I will always be here for you no matter what.

7. Open When You’re Facing a Tough Decision

Making a tough decision is never easy and it’s all too easy to second-guess yourself and your direction. But sweetheart, remember this… your heart will guide you, your instincts will protect you and your brain will ground you. The best internal navigation system will always tap into all three. 

Also, be sure to weigh the pros and cons, consider the long-term effects, and think about what feels right for YOU. Of course, it’s okay to seek advice from those you trust, but ultimately the decision is yours to make. Remember, too, you can come to me for a bit of worldly advice or simply a listening ear. You KNOW I’ll always have your very best interest at heart.

8. Open When You’re Feeling Overwhelmed About School

I know, hon… school can be stressful and exhausting. But remember, this is just one part of your journey. It won’t be this hard forever. Just try your best and take each day in stride. Prioritize your tasks the best you can, stay focused, take breaks when you need to,  and never be afraid to ask for help.

You’re doing your best and that’s all anyone can ask of you. Keep a positive mindset and remember, a number – not a grade, a GPA, or an SAT or ACT score – will EVER define you or your future. The world is filled with highly successful people who stumbled in school. 

9. Open When We’ve Had a Big Fight

It’s easy to say things we don’t mean when things get heated, isn’t it? I’m so sorry we fought. Arguments happen, babe… it’s part of life. Just know that an argument (or twenty arguments!) will never change the love I have for you. We’re figuring this out together, both learning as we go and there are bound to be times we disagree. Let’s both just take a deep breath and vow to try a little harder next time to talk instead of arguing. I know we can work through anything together if we put our minds to it!

10. Open When You’re Afraid to Tell Me Something

I can only imagine how you might be feeling right now, but I want you to know that you can always come to me, no matter what. Whatever it is you’re afraid to tell me, my love for you will never change. I understand it can be scary to open up about certain things, but I promise to listen without judgment. We can face any problem together. Just remember, I’m here to support you through anything.

11. Open When Your Heart is Broken

I wish I could take your pain away, sweetheart. Heartbreak is one of the hardest things to go through, but it’s also a part of life that helps us grow. It’s okay to feel sad and take the time you need to heal. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family, and do things that bring you joy. Remember, this pain will pass, and you will come out stronger and wiser on the other side. You are loved, and your heart will heal in time.

12. Open When You’re Facing Peer Pressure

I get it, sweetheart. You want to fit in. You want to feel accepted. And, you don’t want to be tossed out of the group for being a prude. But remember, you don’t have to prove anything to anyone. It’s okay to say no and make choices that feel right for you. Your values and well-being are more important than trying to please others.

Please… trust your instincts, don’t make decisions you’ll regret, and stay true to yourself. You are strong, and I KNOW you have the courage to make the right decisions. If you ever need to talk or need support, I’m here for you, always.

13. Open When You’re Proud of Something You’ve Accomplished

Take a moment to bask in your success – you deserve it!!! All your hard work, dedication, and effort you’ve put in have paid off. I hope you always remember this feeling, so the next time you stumble, fall, or fail, you’ll brush yourself off, get back up, AND keep trying. I’m incredibly proud of you and all that you are becoming. Keep shining, my dear!

14. Open When You Question My Love For You

I want you to know that my love for you is unwavering and unconditional. No matter what happens or how difficult things get, my love for you will never change. You are my child, and nothing can ever alter the deep bond we share.

There may be times when we disagree or when things feel tough, but please remember that my actions, even when they seem strict or unfair, come from a place of love and wanting the best for you. I may not always get it right, but my love for you is constant. You are an incredible person, and I am so very proud to be your Mom.

If you enjoyed reading, “14 Tender & Supportive Open When Letters for Teenagers,” here are a few other posts you might like!

Your Teen Really DOES Want to Talk to You: Tips for Opening Up the Lines of Communication

Why Teens Are Hesitant to Talk to Their Parents

The Invisible Barrier Between Parents and Teens (and How to Remove It)

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